Second Glance
by joyfulgirl
Summary: Peter Pettigrew had his reasons. Peter second person POV, SLASH (RL/SB)


Pairing: Remus/SiriusBR Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me.BR Author's Notes: This was written for the contrelamontre challenge that said: "Write a story from the point of view of someone who's neither part of the pairing, nor in love with one or more parts of the pairing. Up to sixty minutes." I finished in 56 minutes.BRBR  
  
Thanks to Kioko, Ruth, and Slythdor for the beta.p  
  
Second Glance by Elise Lewyckyj  
  
October 30, 1981  
  
"The plans are all laid out now, Wormtail. When, do you think, should we  
  
carry them out?"  
  
It would have been customary to reply, 'Whenever you think is right, my lord,'  
  
but you think of Remus' stony face breaking open and freezing when he hears  
  
the news, of Sirius' boundless energy jailed forever, of James and Lily together  
  
for infinity where you can't see them, ever again.  
  
You reply, "As soon as possible, my lord. Tomorrow."  
  
*  
  
You were never jealous of any of them. You weren't. You had your share  
  
of girlfriends in school, though they were never the prettiest nor the smartest  
  
nor the most popular. Even Sirius had better girlfriends then you, before  
  
he and Remus got together.  
  
It was Sirius and Remus that bothered you the most, but not because you thought the idea of two boys together was wrong. Lily and James were Head Boy and Girl, the most driven, the best. Everyone knew they would be together, and  
  
you accepted it, along with the rest of the school. But you were still supposed  
  
to be best friends, even when James occasionally opted out on you three for  
  
time with Lily.  
  
Nobody had ever sincerely considered Sirius and Remus as a couple. They were  
  
friends, but they weren't even the closest in your little group until the  
  
second half of sixth year. James and Sirius had been inseparable and unconsciously exclusive since before first year. It was only after Lily that Sirius had truly accepted and opened up to you and Remus. If he could have had it his  
  
way, when you were all eleven, Sirius would have kept James all to himself,  
  
and never even given you and Remus a second glance.  
  
They had so little in common, save their love of mischief and quick minds,  
  
but you were just as mischievous and occasionally as shrewd. Sirius was so  
  
outspoken and open, all sunshine and bright smiles. Remus was secretive  
  
and shy, a shadow, and the moon, no matter how cliché it sounded. They shouldn't have fit so well together, but they did.  
  
Sirius was most comfortable during the day, surrounded by people and light.  
  
He kept away his demons until sunset, and only then did he let his guard  
  
down. Remus was very nearly clamped shut during the day, but he let himself  
  
bloom at night. They completed the puzzle that was the other in that respect.  
  
They thought that no one knew of their frequent trips to the common room  
  
at one in the morning during sixth and seventh year, but you did. You don't  
  
know exactly what transpired during their moonlight conversations, but the  
  
following morning, they would each be exhausted yet quietly content in a  
  
way that made you want to punch their shared half-grins right off their faces.  
  
You weren't jealous of them. You were just jealous of what they had. You  
  
wanted it, but no one could give it to you. No one even bothered to wonder  
  
why you were jealous, because, most likely, they never even noticed.  
  
*  
  
"Tomorrow, Wormtail? Would you be so hasty in this endeavour? You know  
  
what the consequences will be if you fail, and the worst of it will not even  
  
come from me."  
  
"I do." And then, in a rare moment of bravery, "but the plans are as ready  
  
as they will ever be. Does it truly matter if we do it tomorrow or the next  
  
day, or the next?"  
  
He finds your flash of self-assurance entertaining, for he smiles condescendingly,  
  
but his tone is amused. "I suppose you are right, for once. This is your deed to do, and if you wish it to be tomorrow, then it will be tomorrow. You know what to do, when to do it, and where to be. And *do* try your hardest not to fail, little  
  
rat." You hate it when he calls you that.  
  
"I know. I will."  
  
*  
  
October 31, 1981  
  
"Lily and James, Sirius! How could you?" You wave your wand, and, seconds  
  
later, transform back into Wormtail.  
  
The look he wears is one of absolute panic and surprise, but behind his usual  
  
strong flood of emotions is a tiny fragment of relief. You hate him for  
  
it like you have never hated anyone before. You hate that he now knows the  
  
punishment he unjustly faces, knows his best friend is dead, and knows that  
  
you are a traitor. He knows all of this, but he can still smile, because  
  
it was not his lover who betrayed Lily and James, it was you. You, to whom he would have never given a second glance. You were never much more than  
  
a face in the crowd to him; you just happened to be sitting in the front  
  
row.  
  
*It's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.*  
  
He will be caged forever, but he was in love. It's more than you can say  
  
for yourself, anyway. 


End file.
